THEY SUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I fly back to school Saturday morning and the season starts next month. I’m excited for it to start, but I’m also nervous. It’s kinda a weird feeling I have right now. I’m praying I do good. I just have to buckle down and focus when I get back to Salem.

He frustrates me sometimes, but he has this like hold on me that i can’t break free off. The thing is why I can’t break free of his hold is because I don’t want him to let me go. I love this kid to death and back. I’ve never felt like this with any other guy in my life. He’s the first boy I ever considered marrying. The only downfall about him is that he wants to go out on “dates” with other girls and that just doesn’t sit well with me. The thought of him with another guy just brings out this jealous side in me that i’ve never had before. It’s that feeling i had when him and me were friends that I realized that I want to be more than friends. He is now my bestfriend and lover. Jownas changed me, he really did. Before I was partier now I’m a focused goal headed person and i love the person i am now. I’m thankful for that. I just wish I could believe him when he says he doesn’t want to go on these date things anymore. With me it’s like once you’ve hindered or broken my trust it’s really hard to fix and or repair it. But I guess thats part of life. All i know is that i love him <3